Today The Asocial goes to a diner place in one of the city’s most wealthy neighborhoods to meet with a person who’s living situation can technically be classified as homeless. As of what I managed to dig up about that person during my preparations for the interview, I’m aware that he works in the field of software development, is in his mid-20s and been sleeping on the office couch right next to where he works during the day.
When I walked in, it turned out to be hard to figure out at first, which out of many homeless-looking people was him. Many artists live in this area, they tend to dress in a way which is supposed to make them stand out of the crowd. He flagged me down after recognizing my face and we quickly proceeded to begin the interview.
The Asocial (A): Glad to finally meet with you in person, thank you for taking time to do this. I’ve heard many interesting stories about your unusual lifestyle.
The Homeless (H): There’s nothing unusual in it, believe me. I never planned my life to become this… interesting.
A: You sound a little upset about it, why?
H: Well, like I said, I had other plans lined up for myself when I was on a plane to this country. They involved drugs, women and non-stop sex. Instead I had to work my ass off and still ended up being homeless.
A: Sounds upsetting. Go on.
H: I’ve been doing this for half a year, believe it or not. Sleeping in my office, waking up before the building staff comes here, going to my gym every day, taking showers there.
A: Doesn’t sound too comfortable, but at the same time seems to be quite healthy! I’m aware that many people complain about the lack of motivation and there you have it: hygiene! Have to say you look quite strong for a homeless person.
H: laughs No, I had the same build before. I don’t think that muscles can grow if someone’s homeless. Must have something to do with natural selection. I also prefer the term “home-free”.
A: I like it: “home-free”! Well, let me ask you a question that I can expect to come to minds of our readers at some point: since you have a job, why haven’t you just sublet something short-term? They must be paying you something, right?
H: Well, believe it or not, I’ve tried. And it’s a waste of money. People want me to pay a fortune to stay in very… non-private conditions. Good deals are hard to get and it takes an enormous amount of personal time to find something, especially in summer. Besides after spending all day at work you just want some peace and quiet, not listen to some weird stories from a person that you barely know.
A: After you having lead this lifestyle, people must be paying you to stay with them to hear your stories laughs.
H: Well, isn’t it what’s going on here right now? Or am I wrong? You’re going to pay me for this, right?
A: So let’s talk about what lead you to this current situation of yours.
H: I never thought I would end up being a bum. It looks charming when you watch a movie and see somebody being homeless. There’s definitely a lot of freedom in it. But freedom is having money to enjoy freedom. Simple as that. I’ve trusted certain people and spent too much of my time trying to be a nice guy. You have to be able to help yourself before you’re able to help anyone else.
A: Good boys never win, right?
H: They do. Right after they stop being good.
A: So what about your previous adventures? Have you always been struggling to survive?
H: Eventually the place where I lived, I couldn’t stay there any longer. I had a tax debt, very little money and a part-time job which covered only my food. After realizing that my situation was far from great, I decided not to bug my friends and not get help from anyone since I felt like that would be a big mistake. Getting help from others has made me upset and made me unable to live my life as a grown-up adult in the past. After moving out of my place I have rented a mini-storage space in the city, where all of my belongings were residing. Some time later, after sleeping where I was not supposed to be sleeping, taking showers at my gym and keeping my dirty laundry in the storage, I have realized one day that I could live my whole life like this: gym, storage and a place to sleep.
A: And let me guess, the latter one was still a problem? I mean, I’m well-aware of the fact that getting a place in the city is hard enough having a job, let alone being jobless and homeless.
H: Yes, it was tricky. Believe it or not, I was happy being finally free. Had nowhere to go, had no money, but at least it was my life, without anyone knowing where I was, what I was doing and what my plans were.
A: So how did you manage to find a job?
H: A recruitment agency. The trick is to not back down and always keep pushing forward, even if you have no money for food. It’s a very shallow world, so what you wear and how you dress is more important to people than what you know or do. Remember those levels in computer games, everyone plays on them, feeling like they’re inside of a building or some facility, but eventually you find out that the walls are transparent from the other side and tall crates have nothing on the top? …it’s all just decorations. Same goes for how people present themselves to each other. Everyone’s fake, nobody’s honest. I’m not implying that being dishonest is good. In fact, don’t lie if you end up being homeless because of the fact that you’re most likely a bad liar since you’ve ended up like that in the first place. A good liar would never end up being homeless. laughs
A: Good point. So do tell, did you start squatting the office couch right away? Or was it the last resort for you?
H: I’ve managed to save up enough money to be renting a room in the city at the time when I got hired. The financial situation I was in, it was pretty bad and I even had to borrow some cash to afford buying food for the first week of working at my new place. I’ve tried renting a room in the city but was shocked to see how little there was on the market during the summer. Worst deals ever for the highest price you can imagine. And even those places were hard to get! After about a month of wasting my time and money on paying for places I didn’t like at all, the realization came that I will not be able to save up enough money for signing a lease anytime soon while renting those rooms, not to mention that I had only a few months left to pay off my debt.
A: And that’s when you’ve convinced yourself that it’s just for a couple of weeks until you pay off your debt, then it dragged on for months and months, am I…?
H: Precisely!
At this point we got interrupted by a waitress and decided to take a small break to finally order something. I have to say that despite me having certain expectations about the interview, I felt like there’s more to learn from this gentleman than I already have. Being poor is truly the only thing that one can’t buy and it was interesting talking to someone who got caught up in between city life and extreme poverty.
A: So it must be quite hard to keep it a secret, right? How long has it been, a few months?
H: Five months and three weeks! Half of my office knows by now that I’m sleeping on the couch, but nobody is talking about it, which I found to be very nice of them. Most of the staff members at my storage facility do know. I never felt like I was fooling anyone. Having your own place is clearly better.
A: And how about your personal life, if you don’t mind me asking? Have you managed to give a tour of your office to any of your dates?
H: Almost. laughs I’ve ended up going out many times, not like my life has stopped, right? Promised myself to live as fully as I can, be happy and enjoy the summer. Being stuck somewhere motivates you to find a way to escape your situation anyhow, even if it’s just for a little bit. One of my dates got invited to see the office but she has politely declined the invitation. Wasn’t that kind of a girl.
A: Have you ever considered finding a place to stay by getting together with an older lady?
H: Not particularly. I would lose all the pride that I have if I became a prostitute. Though I’ve heard of a guy leading a similar lifestyle, yet he replaced working with selling drugs and sleeping on couches with sleeping on fat girls. To each his own.
A: It does seem to me that this appeal of… a stray guy who is trying to survive may seem attractive to some women.
H: My best bet is to try to make it sound interesting. Keep in mind those old fairy-tales about poor young men rescuing princesses from castles. The truth is that girls want to get together with you right after they find out that you’re a bum. Even if you don’t get to sleep with all women in the world because you’re way too busy being homeless, don’t let that make you upset. It’s enough to know that most girls will be thinking of you while being screwed by their trust fund boyfriends in all possible and a few impossible ways. That’s what counts!
A: Sounds quite optimistic. I do agree that the independence is attractive, that must be it.
H: Yes. As long as you don’t smell bad and don’t look worse than average, you should be fine. “There’s no need to suspend your life” – I’ve told myself. I knew it was a temporary situation and eventually I would get out of it. The time will be gone no matter what you do on the other hand, so just try to put in as many good moments as possible.
A: What would be your words of wisdom for anyone who ends up being homeless having little money?
H: Here it goes:
- Only move forward, keep pushing until you reach the goal. Then take a breath, recharge your batteries, enjoy the moment and move on.
- Don’t be homeless in your mind.
- Protein bars help. Buy in bulk and keep things like bottled water and snacks in your storage, even if it’s against the policy. Just make sure it’s all sealed and won’t attract critters.
A: I’m sure our readers will find it admirable that somebody would not go to a shelter or get on a welfare, but rather would keep fighting to get out of a bad situation.
H: Hope my story inspires and helps people who end up in trouble. Give a man a fishing pole and he will learn how to fish, give a man nothing and he will find his own way.
Here our host had to go take care of his laundry and therefore the interview was over. He didn’t want his name to be mentioned for obvious reasons, but he did tell me that he’s writing a book about surviving the city life while having no money. The Asocial will try to get parts of that book published prior its release.